darkest before the light
coldest before the sunshine
narrowest before the exit
but time serves no one
and ill figure it out someday

The Times

All that we have
its been said and gone
only a few thats left
we await for long

All that we shared
memories its been turned
all of our care
about each other we've learned

The Times are becoming harsh
ties are pushing at tensions
in one week its been flushed
hang on my friends, persere-ration

Seed In The Husk

live no more this weary heart
burn no more this tired soul
in two worlds i lie between
fire has turned icy cold

battered by the heat
a drought claims itself
famine spreads in the land
its people go to sleep

oh! seed in the husk
wake up now you must?
catching is such an insurmountable task
dead or alive by dusk

cant, wont tarry

a long path lays
its so long i cant see the end
its not the distance but the time
more than years, more than me

with you it flies so fast
bus rides like shooting stars
theyre there for a while and poof! its gone
slow mo just slow mo i say

past maplewoods and red lanterns
melancholy blasting in my ears
but i hear one that says : cant, wont tarry!
believe in me it will not delay

the fear ever so real
gripping me on thought of detail
ill live i know, its meaning that goes
cant, wont tarry! wont tarry!

like Mr Doug said : real is good
but include the buts, include the howevers
earthly doubts, tangible scares
compare nothing to the heavenly prayers

aching space

theres something so deep its like an abyss, i cant explain it, but i feel it. i know im aching inside, and i cant wait to see you again. every mornings great. then i slip back again into the abyss. i want to see, i want to see

One Up, Tens Down

you're one up, ten down, doesnt pay off.
trapped in the large world of interests
youre none better than a fool
youre none better than a baby
its gone too soon
time will laugh at you for ten
caught up in the epitome of interests
its somewhere you'll never reach
you've played your cards wrong
perharps others see right, bring on the light
empty hopes, drowning in question
whats in it,
im one up, tens down
none better than nobody.
ill never be what i am psyched to be

Questioning the Realities Of life

Call me a hypocrite. Call me a liar. Call me an asshole, a liar, a piece of shit. In fact, call me whatever you want. Because i know partly i am writing this to make myself feel better, and after this post im probably going to revert back to my old ways again, and so will those who either by chance stumble across this blog, or somehow i don't know with what magical method reads this post.

People often say - "You won't treasure what you have till its gone". Well its true i and i guess everyone at one point of another in their life will experience that. But the thing is, how do you treasure someone or something? Is it to dedicate more of your life to it? If thats true, then the countless items or people that we treasure, will not be treasured at all. If 24 hours were to be equally divided to take a moment to treasure what we love, then we might as well be selfish and prioritise one thing over another.

The controversy is this, when you do that. Wouldn't then you be neglecting the less focused? And then we feel bad, then the "oh i feel bad about this and about that" comes about. BUT WHAT FOR? If you have made the decision to push that thing aside then you might as well stick with it right, don't try to save your face after what you've done, rather my advice is save it before.

I know that after those long paragraphs ill probably revert back to not cherishing what i have. But i don't give a shit anyway.

Anyway, if given the choice to die in my sleep tonight, I certainly would. I would rather be in heaven where God makes everything beautiful, no hate, no revenge, no anger, no pain and no BOREDOM. Well those on earth will probably cry, those who know me more will cry more, but eventually someone will say, " you know he's dead, so get a move on". Then they'll cry even harder and probably for the next few days, where they like to say "Oh everything's so different without him..blah blah". I probably would too actually.( refer to the first line please.) So in the end what you cherish goes away doesn't it?

Lastly, the issue on actions VS words. I guess its true that all the subtle things people take heed the most. Its in times of loneliness where you are who you really are. Some people say that oh what i saw him shine during that period nad therefore he deserves this blah blah. SO what? well the person could be just putting on a false act to deceive you. Are these true actions? And sometimes i do things for other without thinking, i honestly do. And when i hear oh what you're so nice and stuff to do that, it sorta makes me want to do it again just for the sake of portraying a nice image, and thus it isnt as sincere anymore. So should we compliment others at every go? I guess in the end its when you do what you say that counts, it makes the other person trust you more. So i vote action wins, empty words don't count.

So thanks for reading through that boring shit above. How do you cherish i do not know. But one thing I feel is, if the way that a person wants to be stays consistent, then the receiving party will surely know that he/she/it is being cherished.